It's been a long, rough, bumpy road!

Well lets see here, what can I tell you that's been happening. I guess I should start at the beginning when all my stress really started. It started on December 28th, 2008 when I asked my husband to leave our home. I got tired of feeling like I was raising a third child rather than having a partner, friend and lover. I was the only one working, and I was coming home and doing all the housework and making meals and putting kids to bed. Stuff that should have all been done before I had come home from work.

After that I realized how hard being a single parent was going to be. I started having money troubles and slowly sunk into a depression. That's when I made the hardest decision in my life. I put Tyler-Dean and Damien-Cael into temporary foster care. They found a home for them suddenly and left mine on December 23rd, 2009. I cried so hard and my feelings of inadequecy intensified. I sunk into a deeper depression. They were with a very nice family for a couple of weeks and then were moved to a more "permanent home" after that. The family they are with now are amazing and have been working miracles with my boys. For that I thank them.

I am currently trying to get my boys back. It is very hard. I need to find suitable housing and be able to afford to keep living there. That is extremely tough when you barely make ends meet as it is.

On the lighter side, I do get to see my boys often. Now that school is in, it is on the weekends. This past wednesday my youngest, Damien-Cael had just turned 5. Not this weekend but next weekend we are pulling together and having a birthday party for him. I can't wait. I find now I am happiest when I am talking to my boys or when I am talking to my boyfriend, Nate.

So right now I am doing an apartment search. It is hard when people cringe as soon as you say you have young children. But I know my boys are good and very well behaved and I wish these people could see that before hand or just take my word for it.

I did look at one place this last week and it was ok. I loved the bathroom though. It was so big compared to the closets I'm use to.

Well I will keep ya posted on the house search and the boys.

Thanks for reading

Melissa

Here I go Again

Well here I go again. Made yet another blog. Only because I have forgotten my login info for my other accounts lol. I swear if my head wasn't attached I would forget that too.

So this is where I hope I will be able to post my ups and downs. The things in life that make me happy (ie my kids and my boyfriend). The trials and tribulations that I am going through. My successes and things I have learned not to do again (yet I always manage to do again).

Now if this is a day to day blog why did I name it Autistic Inspirationz? Well my oldest son Tyler-Dean (7 years old) was diagnosed with Pervasive Developmental Disorder / Not Otherwise Specified (PDD/NOS) which is an Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). He has been my inspiration in many things such as trying to be a better mom, always testing my patience, pushing my boundaries, and also giving me much strength to do things I never thought I could do.

Now this won't be mostly about Tyler-Dean. I also have another son who I couldn't leave out. His name is Damien-Cael. He is a pure joy. Smart, funny, cheeky, energetic and his brother's protector. He is constantly coming up with the wittiest comments and saying the most hilarious things. He is going to be my ladies man. He is going to be 5 next week and he already has swarms of girls of all ages for all reasons. But for someone who is only 5 years old he has managed to step into the shoes of being his brother's friend, protector, and advocate. When Tyler-Dean is sad, Damien-Cael rushes to his side to find out whats wrong. When someone gets in Tyler-Dean's bad books, that person is in Damien-Cael's bad books too. Don't get me wrong though, the little darling also doesn't pass up a chance to boss his big brother around lol.

I would like to thank my friend Lauren who has given me the inspiration to do this again. I got the inspiration after reading her blog that made me laugh and relate. She is a great person who has a great blog. You should check it out here.